on past lives and new leaves (6.15.2008)

last night i sat with a butcher. a butcher with three faces. a face of honesty, one of happiness, and one of great sadness.
collectively they spoke: "xxxxxx, though you may not want to hear, there are things you must know before you die."
honesty: "this much is true. you are honest but every coin has a second side and every light a complimentary darkness. i do not know what to make of you, and for this i must let you go."
happiness: "this much is true. you are happy but yours is not perfect or absolute. i cannot believe in your happiness and for this i must let you go."
grief: "this much is true. you are sad indeed. your sadness may even rival my own, but it cannot compare in depth or breadth. i've said that i loved you and i say it even still, but because i don't understand your sincerety, i must let you go.
i've said what i felt and i spoke in haste and anger but i speak for the parts of a whole."

happiness: .....

honesty: "agreed."

all three closed their eyes and taking my right arm in his left, the butcher deftly cut away the strings that remained. breathe in once, then out once. in the second breath he planted a seed in the wound.he cradled me like a child for one breath more and then carefully lay my new body down into a basin of warm water.

the water smells like fire here.
"...from here I will grow."